Roadblocks and Revelations

It's so easy to forget about roadblocks and setbacks....... that is, until you hit one.  A week or so ago I had a SHITTY ASS morning. Everything was going wrong and I was angry and frustrated, yet I was trying really hard for it to not turn into a shitty ass day, but I was definitely struggling.  I realized that in the past, when I wasn't so addicted to working out, that I would have used ANY excuse to not work out.  Any little thing would have been a good reason to skip a work out.   For some reason it was different this time.  When I had a shitty morning and my mind was fighting the day, I realized that I needed a work out EVEN MORE, and I started looking forward to it.  I knew if I could keep my mouth shut (and not bite any one's head off or stick my own foot in it), that I could have a break, away from everything, and get my sweat on.  

The thing about exercising, especially if it's kick ass, is that you don't really have time for the mental shit to creep in.  When you're trying to keep up or push yourself harder, or when you're trying to breath or not fall off of a step, you don't have time to dwell on crap.  It naturally goes away.  : )   Aside from that mental side of it, there are physical and chemical reasons why when you work out (endorphins or something), your body releases the stress.   DAMN!  Isn't that amazing!?!?!!?!?    Win freaking win.  

Point is, the difference now for me, is that instead of using stress or frustration as a reason to not work out, I embrace the opportunity I have to GET THROUGH IT and feel a million times better.   I'm so thankful this working out at lunch thing is working out so well.  It really is a life changer for me.   I don't have to fight with myself.   Had I been attempting to work out in the evenings after work, I can guarantee that I would have kept my shitty attitude ALL day, and when I finally got off work would have for sure said "fuck that mess," and went home to the couch.  

Okay, that was the roadblock.   Here's the revelation:

I went for a run yesterday.  First time in a LONG time.  I've been working my ass off at the gym with cardio and strength.  

Side note:  The scale hasn't moved.... good god I've been working my ass off, but that damn number hasn't changed much (fluctuating between 173-175, started at 178).  I jumped SO DAMN QUICK to tell someone online how that number isn't reflective of the work or progress they've done, so I know that part, but it sure is discouraging to keep seeing that same few numbers each week.  I just keep thinking that eventually it's going start melting off, but I'm getting impatient!   To be fair, my body definitely, without a doubt, feels different.  I'm feeling more tone and strong, and my clothes are fitting a little bit better, so I'm not letting it get to me.    Okay, that is really  just a patience issue for me.  I know this is working, and I'm realizing that maybe I need to kick it up a notch.   Hence the run...

So, not only am I needing more cardio to get this fat the hell outta here, but I also signed up for a 5k run in early March.  I haven't been running, so obviously I'll need to train a little bit, even to get to 3 miles.

Back to the point, I ran yesterday.  2 miles.  Pretty much the entire thing, and you know what???????? It was fairly easy, and enjoyable.  I'm shocked!  This whole blog started a couple years ago when I started training for a half marathon.  I've always had a love/hate relationship with running (mostly because it's always been hard and completely un-enjoyable), but I got my mind set on it and I did it.   The thing that happened yesterday, that completely shocked me and motivated me, is that it wasn't too terribly hard.   I still had to focus on breathing, and oh boy are my calves sore today, but I did it, I did it fast and I did it well.
  : D   Proud face!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have to mention, that was the first time running with my minimalist shoes (New Balance Minimus).   I've been wearing them for a while now to work out and just walk around, but never for running.  Towards the end of that 2 miles, I could feel my calves freaking out, and holy shit I can hardly walk now.  I'm assuming that will calm down, and all it tells me is that I need to stretch more and keep practicing.  I am very very happy to know, however, that I can run a 5k race.  Whew! 

I'm thankful too, that even though the number on the scale hasn't changed much, that I received such a clear message yesterday on my progress.   I know 2 miles isn't much, but being able to comfortably run it is a huge accomplishment and it was easier yesterday than the ENTIRE time I was training to do the half marathon.   That right there, is some HUGE proof to me that the work I've been doing has made a difference. 

The other thing that I realized while I was running, stumbling through trying to get my earphones to stay in and the right song on, is that again, for this new feat, I need to set myself up for success.   I can't waste time and energy (and get all frustrated) on my music and earphones when I really want to kick some pavement ass.   So, I will make sure to have the right earphones with me, and also, put some time aside to create a running playlist!  I will definitely be putting my new Muse cd on my ipod - that will last me a while!!   Realize how having a good upbeat tempo, or songs that I know and like is going to be a key thing for my running success. 

That's it for now!  Now, go out and get it on!